March 25, 2013

Today's Reason for Hating '50 Shades of Grey'

I'm tired of perfect characters.  I really fucking am.

I'm barely a quarter of the way into this goddamn book and I'm tired of the main character, Christian Grey. To some extent I can understand teenage girls getting all hot and bothered for over-idealized faff, because everyone in high school is a little bit lame. But women who get off on pretty boy billionaires who gently tell shy girls how really beautiful they are before soaking them in a scented bath after making love all night in only the most sensitive and wonderful ways...christ, they make me just want to vomit. It's like the lady version of trekker nerds salivating over posters of Seven-of-Nine (yes, I know who that is).

Everyone can tell why a person gets into this kind of garbage, and it isn't because it's a good story, or well-written or any of that crap (don't start with me Voyager fans). It's escapism, pure and simple, for people deeply dissatisfied with their mundane little lives.

Don't get me wrong, I'm a fan of escapism under the right conditions, but when any characterization of a man is as shallow and utterly ridiculous as Christian Grey, we've crossed a line from pulpy fun to a weirdly neutered Ken doll. What kind of women are okay with that? When guys pull this kind of gross over-simplification of gender, it's objectifying women. Isn't Christian Grey the same thing? Aren't the ridiculous proportions of a Barbie doll wrong and offensive because they reduce a person to how well they function as a catalyst for someone else's pleasure instead of an emotionally and psychologically complex individual with issues and thoughts and ideas that can all exist outside what the opposite gender fantasizes about?

I mean, how do women read this stuff without feeling dicks?

1 comment:

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