March 1, 2013

Today's Reason for Hating 'Twilight'

The relationship between Bella and Edward is entirely superficial.

I'm not sure why Bella is so into Edward. I've asked a couple people this, and all anyone comes up with is that he sure is pretty. This bothers me for a couple reasons. It's implied in the book that somehow vampirism is related to extreme beauty or the appearance of extreme beauty. Even Edward observes that it makes him a better predator. So are there no ugly vampires? Just ugly humans? Do ugly humans just get pretty if they become vampires? And if beauty is a function of vampires as predators, why isn't Bella more disturbed by her attraction to Edward. Why doesn't she ever wonder if she's only being controlled? For that matter, why doesn't Edward ever wonder if she really loves him or if she's just under the weird toxic effect of his vampire nature? 

Further more, why does Edward like Bella? I get the whole vampire blood lust thing, but why does he want to be around her and not just suck her blood? And why, when he decides to break all the rules, does he just hang out with her instead of breaking her neck and drinking her dry? Plus, if he can read the minds of everyone in the world except Bella, he literally knows everyone better than he knows her. So he's only into her because he doesn't know her very well? 

What the hell? 

What kind of relationship is that? Forget abusive, it's ridiculous! And remember one of the people in this relationship is supposed to be a hundred years old.

That's another thing, actually. If he's so much older than her, isn't he kind of a dirty old man? I mean, Bella's under the legal age of consent to begin with, but being that he's so much older than she is, isn't it kind of gross that a) he's into a high school student and b) that he isn't more emotionally mature than the high school student he's into?  It seems like Edward's got way more issues than just wanting to drink some blood every now and then. He's practically a pervert. 

And Bella? She likes Edward either because he's good looking or because he tells her how special she is for being completely incapable of taking care of herself. I'm not actually sure which is worse, but neither seems like a terribly credible reason for Bella to literally (supposing Edward is actually dangerous and not the complete panzy he appears to be) take her life into her own hands to devote herself to Edward the way she constantly explains she has.

But that's sort of the problem with this whole book. Neither of these characters functions as a believable person, they're cardboard cutouts that readers are supposed to project things onto. I guess that's okay for dumb teen-aged girls, but it doesn't explain all the women out there going ape-shit for this crap. 

Seriously...what...the...hell?

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